Heads are Rolling

It never ceases to amaze me the type of things people will try to pull. I have seen all types of crazy inventions that are supposed to change my life or make things easier in my daily routine and they usually end up being more of a hassle than anything else. Every diet pill I have ever taken or tried usually is not worth the side effects of constant headaches, lack of energy, and explosive bowel movements. I have had people try to sell me Foakleys, Waybans, Polexes, and Goochies. I am sorry but the trunk of a car is not a good place of business. Unless you need a good DvD player at a decent price.

Some people will call in and try to pull one over on us. Because we are on a recorded line if we say something is covered and they go out and have the service provided we have to honor that. Apparently we have subscribers who know this is as well because they will phrase their questions in a way that is misleading to us to get us to cover something ridiculous. For example I had a woman call wondering if we would cover a warm moisture therapy device, at face value this sounds like a peice of medical equipment that would be covered, but when you ask the person to describe the apparatus it is described as a large tub of hot bubbling water... a hot tub.

My favorite one so far is Mrs. Jackaby, here how the conversation went.
"Good morning this is Leroy, may I have your name please?"
"Yes this is Mrs. Jackaby, I was calling to see if a particular medical device is covered."
"Well I would be happy to check for you, what is the device?"
"Well I need to see if a cranial prosthesis is covered."
"Oh my Mrs. Jackaby how are you recovering?"
"Well some days are tougher than others but if I can get this I wouldn't be so embarassed at going out into public."
"Oh right, I could imagine that...well I will check on that and get right back with you."
"Okay, thanks."

So I put her on hold and was just baffled. I checked the contractual exclusions and reviewed her durable medical equipment benefits and was still confused. So I thought I would ask my supervisor. So I walked over to her desk and asked her if a Prosthetic Head would be covered, that I had a lady on the phone wondering if she could get one. She rolled her eyes at me and said, "Leroy...if she needed a prosthetic head how did she even call you? I think you should get her to clarify." That did make sense. So I went back on the phone.

"Mrs. Jackaby thanks for holding for me. I spoke with my manager and she was wondering how you called into us if you need a fake or prosthetic head."
"Leroy I said Cranial Prosthesis..."
"Yes mam, your Cranium is your head."
"Oh...well I must be confused maybe its called something else. It goes ontop of your head and replaces your hair."
"Right the scientific term for that is a wig..."
"Well...yes I guess your right."
"Yeah I'm sorry Mrs. Jackaby a wig is not covered unfer your benefits..."
"So you cover Viagra but you wont cover a damn wig?!"
"Actually no Mrs. Jackaby we would not cover viagra for you either, since your a female."
"Smart ass..." Then she hung up.

Well if anyone knows someone with a prosthetic head let me know, I would really like to check that out. -Leroy